All posts by teleskees

Book Review, Exercise, Life and Meaning, Skiing, Space, Truth and Perception

MUSINGS FOR MONDAY, NOVEMBER 5TH, 2018

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“Look again at that dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every “superstar,” every “supreme leader,” every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there-on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.

The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot.

Our posturing’s, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.”  – Carl Sagan

 

Damn what can I say…  It has been a really good week!!  Ski season has started and life is good!!  Got a chance to go up to Loveland Ski area on Thursday, November 1st and the snow was great.  I am hoping this winter will deliver a ton of snow.  The last couple of years have been on the wimpier side or I have just gotten used to a more abundant snowfall when my kids were little.  Not really sure.  I have not had a chance to really look at the records myself, but I do know that the “water guys” that keep track of this said that the last couple of years were not good for moisture in the mountains.  So maybe we are due?  That would be fantastic.  I used to get upset if we did not get our usual 50 inches of snow here in Fort Collins, but after living here for 30 plus years I am OK with it not snowing!  I guess I have gotten old!?  What is that about?  Where does the time go?  Lol.  Anyways – all kidding aside, if it would just dump in the mountains so to speak, then most of the state’s water woes would take care of themselves.

I have been watching a course called “The Search for Exoplanets: What Astronomers Know” and I have to say it is pretty amazing.  I did not know that the first serious science proposals of what might be out there in the rest of the Universe started in the 1940s.  I was thinking that it was much more recent.  But it truly started in the 1940s – at that time the technology of astrometry became good enough to detect planets.  Astrometry is the measurement of the position of a star on the sky, and if the star has planets, its position will wobble back and forth.  Because the technology was crude in today terms, there was conflicting evidence reported back then, so it did not get a lot of attention.  Fast forward to the late 1980s and early nineties, add in a few more techniques for detection and things start to get really serious.  In 1995 and on, the discover of exoplanets began to grow exponentially, and scientist from around the world were able to corroborate each other’s results.  This made a huge difference with the acceptance and birth of “Exoplanetary Science.”  What was once Science Fiction has now become accepted scientific fact.  It is well worth the money for the course.  It is about 12 hours of lecture divided up into 24 mini-lectures.  You can find it at the Great Courses:  https://www.thegreatcourses.com/courses/the-search-for-exoplanets-what-astronomers-know.html and you can find used editions on Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Search-Exoplanets-What-Astronomers-Know/dp/1629972037/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1541360656&sr=8-4&keywords=the+search+for+exoplanets+what+astronomers+know, you can do this course as a audio book or as DVD or Online streaming.

I wanted to post the above quote by Carl Sagan.  I think it really hit home with me after finishing the course.  We truly are just a speck of dust in a sunbeam.  And my guess, is that as we look for more exoplanets, we will find that we are not that special or unique.  Very, very sobering indeed.

An exoplanet or extrasolar planet is a planet that orbits a star other than the Sun. Over 2000 exoplanets have been discovered since 1988. Specifically, 2098 planets in 1342 planetary systems including 509 multiple planetary systems as of 24 March 2016.

Well that is about it for me on this post.  I think that the Ultra season for me this year has come to an end.  Even though I did not successfully finish the Run Rabbit Run 100.  I still feel pretty good, after all it was 50 miles when I timed out and as someone much wiser than I am at times said, 50 miles is still 50 miles.  So, time to get ski season on and enjoy the snow while it is there.  I do plan on racing some shorter runs for the remainder of the year and the start of next year, mainly to work on speed.  I will let you know how it goes!

A late evening Fall afternoon in Fort Collins.

Take care my friends and maybe I will see you out there on the trails or at the ski slope!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Book Review, Colorado, Psychology, Religion, Sociology

MUSINGS FOR MONDAY 29TH, OCTOBER 2018

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“You must do the things you think you cannot do.”                        Eleanor Roosevelt

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.  You are able to say to yourself, “I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that come along.””  Eleanor Roosevelt

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”    Eleanor Roosevelt

 

Fort Collins Sunsets – great afternoon and evening running this week!!

Well it is the end of and the beginning of another week.  This blog post was a little late in getting out due to working at the day job over the weekend AND studying for a class required by said day job.  I pull 12 hour shifts and it does not leave much time to do anything else.  Especially if you want to ensure you get an adequate amount of sleep.  It just amazes me how often I would short myself on sleep and then wonder why I got sick.  And why I thought this was a normal occurrence?!  I have become one of those anal people that track everything, including sleep.  Seven to eight hours is now the norm.  And guess what?  I do not get sick as often as I have in the past.  A definite decrease in the number of colds and viral illnesses, etc.…  I also attribute this to eating a much healthier diet than I did in the past too.  But that is a topic for another Blog post.

A great book out there on this subject.  And one, I would say needs to be put in that “read a second time category” is called “Why We Sleep” by Matthew Walker, PhD.

You can find this book at Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Why-We-Sleep-Unlocking-Dreams/dp/1501144324/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1539802696&sr=8-3&keywords=why+we+sleep&dpID=51dUdCh2ZdL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch

One of the things the author goes over is sleep and how it is affected by alcohol.  It really changed my perspective on having a drink, be it beer or wine, with dinner.  I have stopped doing this except for every once in a great, great while. (like once per month) Also, he talks about how our memory is affected by the lack of REM sleep due to alcohol intake.  I call this a “hard truth” because if you are like me you grew up with alcohol being a part of family traditions so to speak and it is hard to get away from.  After reading the book, I think of all the nights of burning the candle at both ends, drinking, staying up late, etc.… and how in reality this was a total waste of time.  I truly believe that it prematurely aged me physically.  Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do about changing the past but to go forward with better lifestyle habits.

And for shift workers that do night shifts.  In my opinion they do not get paid enough.  Truly, for all the individuals that work nights, I would go as far as to say you need to get paid time and half.  Great book.  Well worth the read or two.

 

Another book that I think is a good read is called the “The Book of Joy” by Douglas Carlton Abrams, the Dalai Lama, and Desmond Tutu.  It is basically an interview and discourse between two “Spiritual masters” that have very different back grounds but do share the one common element of having faced and survived significant adversity in their lives.  The Dalai Lama’s persecution by the Chinese and Desmond Tutu’s struggle with the South African Government and Apartheid.

 

One of the reasons I believe the book is interesting is that they both come from two different religious backgrounds.  One is Buddhist and one is Christian.  When asked questions, their answers are not that far apart from each other.  Obliviously there are some major “religious dogma” differences but philosophically they are very close in the advice they give.  The other part of this book that I found inspiring was how they came to grips with the adversity and still found joy and what appears to be lasting happiness.  I listened to the book as an audio book while running but it might be better to purchase it as regular print so that you can go back and reread a section or two.

You can find the book at Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Book-Joy-Lasting-Happiness-Changing/dp/0399185046/ref=sr_1_1/135-8262170-6644902?ie=UTF8&qid=1540750504&sr=8-1&keywords=dalai+lama+joy+book

 

Almost done with the current drawing.  Getting closer…  Lol.

Winter is coming and the squirrels are scarfing food where ever they can find it.  Lol

Well that is about it for me.  Hope you get a change to read the above two books.  They are defiantly worth the effort.  Have a great week and may life be good for you.   See you out there on the trails!!

Art, Book Review, Meditations, Psychology

MUSINGS FOR MONDAY 15TH, OCTOBER 2018

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“My goal is to be better than I was yesterday.  To improve myself.  To enrich my life.  I am running my own race.  I compete with no one but myself.  This is my journey.”  – Unknown?

First snow for winter 2018 – about 8 inches at our location.

Well it has been another good week.  Winter has made an appearance in Colorado.  With the cold came the added bonus of moisture and that is something we needed on the Front Range.  Fort Collins is considered High Plains Desert and we were about 5 inches behind in total moisture content.  So, any that fell this past week was a really good thing.  When you only get about 14 inches total per year, five inches is a lot to be missing.  The only down side for me was not being able to work on outdoor projects around the house but this turned out to be nothing too serious.  I will take the snow and rain that fell last week and this weekend.

I was reading a book from the author Seth Godin.  I had not heard of him and found a quote by him just by accident.

“Instead of wondering when your next vacation is, maybe you should set up a life you don’t need to escape from.”

I thought this was kind of interesting.  If you are like me you are always looking for the next vacation.  Where to go and what to do.  So, this quote got me to thinking.  We are always trying to do something different.  Never being truly where we are at the moment.  Thinking ahead to what is next and around the corner.  Now this can be a good thing but doing it all the time is not the road I believe that leads to happiness.  Maybe we have it all wrong.  This quote got me to reevaluate my life to see what I needed to keep and what I needed to cut.  You might find it surprising that something on the surface you will think that you need to cut but it may not be that way down deep.  It might be the best thing to keep.

You can find the book at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Icarus-Deception-How-High-Will/dp/1591846072/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1539652230&sr=8-1&keywords=icarus+deception

The book is good enough to be placed in the “It warrants a second read category”.  A part of the book that really resonated with me was Seth talking about “Being your own boss.”  Whether you are self-employed or not.  I think that we see this quote a lot.  And only think of it in terms of having our own business.  But do we really know what it means to be our own boss?  That was the question I found most intriguing.  I will say it a second time, “Do we really know what it means to be our own boss?” What I found was that my understanding of the phrase was very limited.

What a difference a day makes!!  View from the Powerline Trail in Fort Collins.

Now I am in the fifth decade of my life and I can look back at all the bosses I have had – some good, some that were excellent and some that…, well they were not that great.  Think about that for a moment.  If you are like me you have had a multitude of bosses.  What were they really like?  How did you perform with each boss?  Did you enjoy going to work?  Did the type of boss influence how you felt about work?  Did it affect your job performance?  NOW see yourself as “your own boss.”  And ask yourself “What Kind of Boss Do You Want to Be?”  You don’t have to be self-employed to ask this question.  That idea of asking the question even if you are not self-employed changed the perspective dramatically for me.

One of the Prospect Ponds.

Think about this, if you were given the responsibility of managing one employee.  To control everything in their life.  And your sole job was to make the business and that one employee as successful as possible.  What would you do?  How would you act towards that one employee?  Would you be the best boss that you could be?  Or would you be the boss that everyone wants to get away from? No one wants to work for?  Good questions and worth pondering.

Poudre River Trail.

NOW see yourself as that one employee.  That’s right, you are the employee and you are your own boss.  They are one and the same.  If you are like me, this changes the whole perspective.  I want to be the best possible boss that I can be.  And in turn I want to be the model employee, the best employee, for that boss!  If you can put yourself in the duel role of boss and employee, at the same time, it will change how you see and perceive your life.  What a daunting and awesome responsibility.  How would it change your behavior toward yourself and others?  It is one of those things that I wish I could have understood much sooner in life.  As the old saying goes “We are our own worst enemies.”  All of us.  Understanding of “You are your own boss” is one way to get past this worst enemy conundrum.  I believe that this is a step in the right direction on the path to happiness.

September 20th

October 5th

October 15th, 2018

Well that is about it for me.  The latest heart picture is getting closer to completion.  Hope everyone had a great weekend.  Maybe I will see you out there on the trails!!  Adios amigos!!

Art, Book Review, Colorado, Meditations, Psychology, Truth and Perception

MUSINGS FOR MONDAY 8TH, OCTOBER 2018

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“Buddhism does not advocate faith in the sense of believing something because it is written in a book, attributed to a prophet, or taught to you by some authority figure.  The meaning of faith here is closer to confidence.  It is knowing that something is true because you have seen it work, because you have observed that very thing within yourself.  In the same way, morality is not a ritualistic obedience to a code of behavior imposed by an external authority.  It is rather a healthy habit pattern that you have consciously and voluntarily chosen to impose upon yourself because you recognize its superiority to your present behavior.” 

– Mindfulness in Plain English, by Bhante Gunaratana

FALL 2018 – LEAVES ARE CHANGING IN FORT COLLINS!!

Well it has been a good week.  Again, I really cannot complain.  Life is good.  It is not perfect, but what is?  Everything is changing and nothing is static for long.  Change is the only constant.

LAST CORD OF A 4 CORD TOTAL!!

I have continued this week to put up firewood for the winter.  Four cords total.  Good to get it done early and to be ready when the snow and cold temperatures come.

JULY 26TH

AUGUST 13TH

SEPTEMBER 3RD

OCTOBER 5TH

Finished the deck above the garage, but still working on the structure above the garage deck.  This has taken me some time.  As you can see by the dates and the above photos.  But when it is done I think it will be worth the effort.  I will show some photos when it is finally finished.  Trying to get it done before Thanksgiving. Lol.

I have started to reread a book this year called:  MINDFULNESS in PLAIN ENGLISH, by Bhante Gunaratana.  This will be the fourth time I have read it.  It is an excellent book on Meditation and Mindfulness.  This is one of those books that rereading it at least once a year is something you want to make a habit of.  It is that good.  Truly if you want to be able to enjoy life more, no matter what your circumstances are or what is going on in the world, this could be the single most important book you could read this year.  The book is a very readable down to earth look at what meditation is and is not.  A nuts and bolts book that “Westerners” can understand.

The book itself is about 196 pages not counting the Index.  Every time I have read this book I come across something new or more likely, “understand” better what the author is talking about.  I am not a religious or spiritual person.  In fact, I am an Atheist.  And that is what drew me to Buddhism.  I know that might sound funny to some but I see Buddhism as a form of philosophy that has been tried and tested over millennia with no “Divine Authority Needed.”  The purpose of meditation is personal transformation.  The person that goes into “meditation” so to speak is not the same person that comes out.  You can use these same techniques in meditation no matter what religion you are.  Or you don’t even have to have a religion like me.  It will work for anyone if they give it thoughtful consideration.  Just to be clear I am talking about vipassana meditation.

From the book: “In vipassana meditation we cultivate this special way of seeing life.  We train ourselves to see reality exactly as it is, and we call this special mode of perception mindfulness.  This process of mindfulness is really quite different from what we usually do.  We usually do not look into what is actually there in front of us.  We see life through a screen of thoughts and concepts, and we mistake those mental objects for reality.  We get so caught up in this endless thought-stream that reality flows by unnoticed.  We spend our time engrossed in activity, caught up in eternal pursuit of pleasure and gratification and eternal flight from pain and unpleasantness.  We spend all of our energies trying to make ourselves feel better, trying to bury our fears, endlessly seeking security.  Meanwhile, the world of real experience flows by untouched and untasted.  In vipassana meditation we train ourselves to ignore the constant impulses to be more comfortable, and we dive into reality instead.  The irony of it is that real peace comes only when you stop chasing it.”

I think of the above as “turning in” to what is happening around you.  Not to try and run from unpleasant situations or thoughts but turning in towards them.  This is not a doctrine you need to drill into yourself, but an observable reality that with practice you can see for yourself.  The idea is to make the “mindfulness” so common place that you do it without really thinking about it, no matter the situation.  This part of mindfulness that has taken me a long time to master and I am still working on it.  The idea of: “Don’t confuse Training Conditions with Real World Situations/Actions.”  When the proverbial “Shit hits the fan” conditions occur in my life – I still fall back into old habit patterns and forget all about mindfulness practice.

From the Book: “One of the most difficult things to learn is that mindfulness is not dependent on any emotional or mental state.  We have certain images of meditation.  Meditation is something done in quiet caves by tranquil people who move slowly.  Those are training conditions.  They are set up to foster concentration and to learn the skill of mindfulness.  Once you have learned that skill, however, you can dispense with the training restrictions, and you should.  You don’t need to move at a snail’s pace to be mindful.  You don’t even need to be calm.  You can be mindful while solving problems in intensive calculus.  You can be mindful in the middle of a football scrimmage.  You can even be mindful in the midst of a raging fury.  Mental and physical activities are no bar to mindfulness.  If you find your mind extremely active, then simply observe the nature and degree of that activity.  It is just a part of the passing show within.” 

You can download the book as PDF off the web.  Yes, it is free. (my first time to read it) I found that it was so good, I went ahead and bought a copy from Amazon.  https://www.amazon.com/Mindfulness-Plain-English-Revised-Expanded/dp/0861713214/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_14_t_0/145-7252461-2444901?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=68396RBSG0293KGXVV6C

Well that is about it for me this week.  But one last thing.  The most recent heart picture is coming along.  Slowly but surely.

SEPTEMBER 20TH

OCTOBER 5TH

Take care my friends and I hope see you out there on the trails!!

 

Colorado, Exercise, Meditations, Psychology, Thankfulness, Truth and Perception

MUSINGS FOR SUNDAY 30TH, SEPTEMBER 2018

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“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did.  So, throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

“Each moment in time we have it all, even when we think we don’t.” – Melody Beattie

Well it has been a good week.  Getting back into running a little bit this week and still doing some bike riding.  The weather has been beautiful.  We do need rain but at the same time and I have to say it again, the weather has just been fantastic for getting out doors.  Truly beautiful.  Warm afternoons, with cool mornings.  The sunsets have been stunning the past two weeks.  And I really cannot complain.   All the pictures below were taken in Fort Collins in the late afternoon/ early evening Monday though Thursday.   I am fortunate to live where I do.

Lake Sherwood in Fort Collins looking West on Monday evening.

Spring Creek Trail in Fort Collins looking West on Tuesday evening.

Powerline Trail in Fort Collins looking South on Wednesday evening.

Poudre River Trail in Fort Collins looking West on Thursday evening.

It is that time of year again and I am starting the process of putting up firewood.  Had two cords of pallet wood delivered this week.  I have to say this stuff burns great.  The trick to making it a lot less of a hassle to stack is to build your wood racks so that you don’t have to stack it.  You can just throw the various pieces in the rack not caring how they land.  Took me a few years to figure this out.  Lol.  This process makes it a lot easier to put it up.

Well on a different note, even though I have everything that I need and really want, there are days that I wake up thinking that I need something more, something different, something new, more money, a different car, a different bike, different running shoes, more this, more that, more, more and more.  If you let it, the “More Virus” as I call it,  will continue without end.  A vicious cycle.  Always promising happiness, but never delivering.  Never delivering a lasting happiness anyways.  This was one of those weeks were I was infected so to speak.  First it was thinking that I needed new running shoes, then it was a different bike, next the “monkey mind” wandered on to a different RV (yes, I own an RV), and of course with all these new things, the next logical step was I needed more money, so then you need to work more, etc.…  And I won’t bore you with the rest, needless to say this cycle went around and around in my mind for most of the week until about midway through I started to look at the above pictures.  As I said before, I collected these over the last week during a run or bike ride and realized that the “More Virus” could jeopardize future moments like this.  And that is all it took to comprehend, I was really, really happy this week.  It was a very good week and nothing in the “material world” could have added to it.  And that inoculated me from the “More Virus” for the week.  For next week…Lol….

Well that is about it for me.  Have a great week and I hope to see you out there on the trails!!  Adios amigos!!

 

Art, Colorado, Exercise, Meditations, Psychology, Run Rabbit Run

MUSINGS FOR SUNDAY 23RD, SEPTEMBER 2018

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Plunge Your Whole Life into What You Are Doing

“Just as when you sit in meditation you just sit, when you sleep, be aware of the totality of your whole being going to sleep.  When walking, you just walk.  When you eat, you are right there just eating.  Plunge your whole life into what you are doing at that very moment and live that way.  So, we train ourselves to engage our whole being in what we are doing.  Whether sitting or eating, you are not engaged in discursive, wandering, or deluded thoughts.  All of you…environment, body, and mind…is right there.  Whatever you do, whatever the task at hand, your whole life is there at that moment.

Some people may interpret plunging your whole being into the practice or into the task at hand as a very tense approach.  This is incorrect.  By putting your whole being into what you are doing, you are also being relieved from doing anything else at that moment.  Therefore, when you are doing that one thing, that is all you have to care about, and you can do it in a very relaxed manner and attitude.  In this light, you will better understand the meaning of engaging your whole being in the present task.  This is a relaxed and reposed attitude to practice.”

Excerpted from: “The Method of No-Method:  The Chan Practice of Silent Illumination, by Chan Master Sheng Yen

 

Happy Autumnal Equinox!!  First day of fall?!  Wow where did the time go??  Well….. it has been a good week.  Still recovering from the attempt at the 100 miles with the Run Rabbit Run.  It has been nice to just do some easy bicycling each day this past week.  The temps are getting cooler in the mornings and you can tell that fall is in the air.  Even with the unseasonably hot weather.  The air conditioner is not running constantly, trees on the front range are starting to change leaf color, etc.…  I am wondering what this winter will bring?  Will it be non-existent so to speak with less snow and more rain?  Or will it be like the winters of the past?  I guess only time will tell.

Looking West towards the Foothills – Spring Creek Trail.

Prairie Dog (Colorado State Rodent) on Spring Creek Trail.

The bike riding in the afternoons has been fantastic.  I am very fortunate to live in a city that continues to expand its trail system.  If you really wanted to help your citizens with health care, then get them outside and walking, running, biking, skating, etc.…  Whatever it might be.  The trick is that you need easy and I mean easy access.  We are all creatures of habit and we need that easy access to help with the “willpower requirement” of just getting out.  We could prevent a lot of our health care cost just with preventive strategies like exercise.  It is an old idea but still just as valid since time immortal.

I have been working on another “anatomical heart” picture.  They do take time.  I figure in this one I already have about 5 to 6 hours of drawing in place.  And I am only about a 4th of the way done.  This is a smaller one at 7 inches by 10 inches.  I will show more of it as the weeks go by.  I usually get an hour or two drawing each day.  This will be the fourth one I have done of the hearts.

I love the above quote from the book “The Method of No-Method: The Chan Practice of Silent Illumination.”  Some days I am much better with this practice than others.  Modern media and advertising does not help.  Always wanting you to want more.  Distracting you from what you are doing.  I have found that doing meditation each day helps with this.  Focusing me on what I am doing so that I can just be in the moment.  Not letting my mind pull me in a thousand different ways.  Just taking a deep breath and bringing myself back into the moment.

Monkey Mind – all the things I have to do – over and over and over and – I need this, I need that, I cannot live without this, etc.…

Realizing that it is OK, the “monkey mind” is going to wander… The trick is to realize that you will have to pull it back into alignment… a lot.  Over and over until it become second nature.  If you are like me, our minds really have the tendency to wonder and this is without the help of modern media.  I wonder what it would have been like to live 150 years ago?  Before radio, before TV, before cell phones, before the internet.  Would it be a good idea to once a year go on a “modern media hiatus”, even if it was only for a week.  I think that it would be even hard to do for a day?  Or you could spend a significant sum on a Zen retreat where all form of electronic communication is forbidden?  I have not tried either yet but maybe that is the next step?  Well just some thoughts running around in my “Monkey Brain.”

The reposed and relaxed goal to shoot for.  If Home can do it so can you!!  Lol

Well on the above note, I am thinking that will be all for me this week.  Hope to see you out there on the trails!!  Adios amigos!!

 

 

 

Colorado, Exercise, Psychology, Run Rabbit Run, Trail Running

MUSINGS FOR SUNDAY 16th, SEPTEMBER 2018

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“Run for 20 minutes and will feel better, run another 20 and you might tire, add on 3 hours and you’ll hurt, but keep going and you’ll see and smell and hear and taste the world with vividness that will make your former life pale.”     Scott Jurek

“It hurst up to a point and then it doesn’t get any worse.”    Ann Trason

Life is good and I cannot complain too much at the moment!!  Ed B.

Really love that quote.  It is my own, but I am not partial.  Just that, it is my reality.  As I have gotten older everyday that I wake up and become mindful of taking a breath…well that is a good day.

Looking West towards Cameron Pass

I have been in Steamboat Springs since Tuesday Night.  Nice place to just hang out.  The drive from Fort Collins to Steamboat was beautiful.  The Aspens are in their “changing color” mode and the views were a little extra special around Cameron Pass.   Really hard to do it justice with the pictures.

Steamboat itself is an interesting place.  After multi visits here over the years,  you start to appreciate the “mountain towns” that were actually a thriving community before they became ski area destinations.  There is a little more of a solid feel to them than just a tourist trap so to speak.   It  has the feel of a much bigger town in some respects but still, I think, maintains the small town atmosphere.  By 8pm at night, most shops have closed up,  except the bars.  Which can be an inconvenience or depending on how you see it, refreshing. Even in summer it is a bustling place.  Just the amount of traffic on highway 40 (Main Street in town) can be  daunghting.

From the base of the ski area

From mid way up Mount Werner

Main Street in Steamboat looking East

Yampa River in Steamboat looking West

Well the Run Rabbit Run 100 went pretty well.  We had great weather.  A little hot at times, but clear skis for the start of the race.   Not like last year with the smoke from surrounding wildfires.  The Silver Creek fire did flare up again but luckily the winds were in the right direction to keep the smoke south of Steamboat this year for the 100 mile race.

Looking South from I-40/Hwy 14

From the bike trail in Steamboat

This year, the race for me ended at the 50 mile mark.  I timed out.  But even with this, it was a great race.  This is only the second attempt for me of 100 miles.  I timed out 2 years ago at the Leadville 100, again at the 50 mile mark.   I learned a lot this weekend.  Simple things like running through the woods in the night,  staying warm after running 35 miles, what you can eat and not eat, and the proper utilization of drop bags.  All of these things sound simple enough but when you are in the thick of things they can all add up to mean the difference from a “death march” type race, to one that is a lot more enjoyable.   I have to say I felt pretty good after running the 50 miles.  Sure I was sore but I did not feel like I needed the ER.  Lol

Before picture!

After 50 miles and 18 hours of running!

I have now done the 50 mile distance 6 times in the last 5 years.  4 times for an actual race finish and twice while attempting 100s.   I guess the 100 mile will have to wait another year.   My wife Janet is always good to remind me that 50 miles is nothing to put down.  As she has reminded me more than once.  50 miles is still 50 miles.

Looking down from Fish Creek Falls Trail during the run

Long Lake, second aid station on the run

This race is consider a “hard” 100 miler and I do believe that it lived up to its reputation.  The added Fish Creek Falls Trail section was beautiful, especially the downhill section until the relization hits you that you have to turn around at the bottom and run/walk back up, add in alot of heat for the day and well… you get the picture.  I believe I consumed about 10 liters of water for the day.  During the night when the temps dropped into the 40s, the aid stations at Summit Lake and Billy’s Rabbit Hole were outstanding.  Well organized and very helpful with a palpable energy from the volunteers.  I can tell you they truly made a difference in my race.  The “potato soup” at both stations was fantastic.  All and all the race was what I expected it to be.  A class act when you consider that  it is all volunteers that are making this happen.   I hope to be back next year.

Before I go I would like to give a big thank you to the Race Committee, and all the volunteers.  Without you this type of event would not be possible.  THANK YOU!!

And a reminder that without the support of the sponsors this event would not be possible.  Thank you to:  Altra, Honey Stinger, Black Diamond, IceSpike, Smartwool, Wyndham Vacation Rentals, Tailwind, Ultimate Direction.

Well that is about it for me this week.  Hope to see you out there on the trails!!  Adios amigos!!

 

Art, Dogs, Exercise, Psychology, Run Rabbit Run

MUSINGS FOR SUNDAY 9th, SEPTEMBER 2018

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“Once you realize that the road is the goal and the that you are always on the road, not to reach a goal, but to enjoy its beauty and its wisdom, life ceases to be a task and becomes natural and simple, in itself an ecstasy.”     By Nisargadatta

 “The goal is the road and the road is the goal.” – My understanding of Nisargadatta!

 “The pessimist is not guaranteed a tomorrow.  And, if tomorrow does come, the pessimist does not expect to feel better at the same point in the race…. indeed, it might feel even worse.  So, the pessimist plugs on and accomplishes their goals today.  And today is the only day that counts.” – Gary Cantrell

 

Well this week has been a better week.  Compared to last week things are much better.  Losing a furry family member was hard.  Especially one like “dog-girl.”  It is hard to put into words what she meant to Janet and I.  I tried last week to do that with the blog post.  Rereading that post this week, still does not seem like I did her justice.  But not wanting to dwell on this issue in this weeks post I will move on.  Of course, I cannot guarantee that it will not come up from time to time.  Coming to grips with change (loss), any kind of change is hard.

Meeker and Longs from the West Side of Fort Collins

Tall Aspens off of Highway 14 in the Poudre Canyon

It has been nice running this week.  Good to get out and clear my head after last week.  The smoke from the wildfires in West has cleared somewhat and the running has been good.   I am trying to get in as much trail running as I can before the Run Rabbit Run.  Still shooting for that 100-mile distance.  Not sure if I can do it but I plan to try.

I know the old Yoda Saying… “Do or do not, there is not try”.  But I am still not that confident that I can do it.  I really believe that I can get in a 50 miler this year but how much further can I get – can I do the whole 100?  That is the thing that I want to see if I can do.  I am anxious just thinking about it.  Sooooo, to get myself to the starting line, I have told myself to look at it as “let’s just see how far you can get”, “run at your pace”, “enjoy the experience”, and “see where it will take you.”

Resident Deer on the Poudre River Trail in Fort Collins

I never thought of being “pessimistic” as a good thing.  But when you see it in the light of the quote above by Gary Cantrell, it takes on a little different meaning.  A little touch of “Pessimism” is really helpful in getting motivated to do things.  Especially hard things.  How many days have I just wanted to stay in bed because the day had something that might be consider tough to do?  Way too many.  The old saying “put it off tomorrow.”  Just let it go.  But the next day things actually might be worse.  So, the idea is to buck it up and do it.  Just like the Nike slogan of “Just Do It.”  Get it done.  I am still not very good at this but I hope that I am getting better.

Blooming Creosote Bushes in Fort Collins

On a different note, towards the end of August I finished a couple of new pieces of art work.  I started to draw anatomical hearts after my son in-law suggested that my oldest daughter liked them.  And he wanted me to do a few for her.  So, I did.  I might have to continue along this line for a while and see where it takes me.  If you do a quick google search you will find all kinds of anatomical heart drawings and paintings.

Pen and ink – size is 11 x 14 inches

Pen and ink – size is 11 x 14 inches

Pen and ink – size is 7 x 10 inches

Well I think that is about it for me this week.  I will let you know how the Run Rabbit Run goes in the next post.  Take care my friends, maybe I will see you out on the trails.  Remember winter is coming and ski season is just around the corner!!  Adios amigos!!

 

Dogs, Grieving, Life and Meaning

MUSINGS FOR SATURDAY 1st, SEPTEMBER 2018

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KNOWING
 If I had known that on that day our time was near the end
I would have done things differently, my forever friend.
I would have stayed right next to you deep into the night
but I thought I’d see you in the early morning light.
And so, I said “Good night” to you as I walked in through the door
never thinking of the time when I’d see you no more.
But if I had known that on that day our time was at the end
I would have done things so differently, my forever friend.
 Sally Evans (written for Shoo-Fly)

 

I usually start off a blog with this has been a good week.  After all we really don’t have much control whether the week is good or bad.  Just how we respond to it.  But this week has been especially bad.  We lost our best buddy for the last 12 years.  Our beloved white German Sheppard, Neige (French for snow) had to be put down on Tuesday.  And I am telling you, that was hard.  She had developed a condition known as Canine Degenerative Myelopathy.  I guess in some ways it is similar to MS or ALS in humans.  There is no cure for it.  Since her diagnosis in May she had become a “housebound dog.”  Prior to that point she had been taking her usual 5 to 6 mile walk several days each week.  So, we had a little bit of time to realize and to come to grips with, the fact that the inevitable was coming.

But your never ready for that moment.  Janet and I were not ready.  How do you accept and express overwhelming grief when it comes?  Neige was our forth Sheppard in the last 35 years.  She was our touchstone.  No mater what kind of day it had been, you could always depend on “dog-girl” being there to give unconditional love and affection.  To say that she had become a part of the family was an understatement.  Even when she became house bound, she was always there wagging her tail, happy to see you,  giving you the thumbs up in “dog speak” when you got home.

A true snuggle hound at times.

A hiking buddy.

A skiing companion.

The listener.

 

Her passing has left a large gap in our lives.  Right now, I am not sure if it will ever heal, and that is OK.  She will always be a part of us.

I have heard that the emotional wounds that are the deepest, are reminders that you need to take a moment to slow down.  To not be in a big hurry.  To be mindful of what is going on around you.  I find myself thinking back about all the “Neige Moments” that I would like to relive with a new appreciation.  But I can’t…  I can only go forward.

Good by Neigie, you were much, much more than a loyal and faithful companion.  If I had known that our last time together was near.  I would have done things so differently……

 

Damn this has been a tough week.  I know things will get better.  And I need to give myself time.  Maybe a little more running on the trails this next week well help to lessen the grief.  Take care my friends, slow down and savor the moments.  Until next time, adios.

 

 

 

Life and Meaning, Night Shift Work, Psychology

MUSING FOR FRIDAY 24TH, AUGUST 2018

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“The fear of letting go prevents you from letting go of the fear of letting go.” – John Burdett (Novelist)

 

Well it has been another good week!! Finished working a stretch of four-night shifts and I have come to the conclusion that they really mess with your system.  Not sure why it took me that long to get it through my head that it really does muddle with your body’s clock.

Yep, screw with the body’s clock or circadian rhythms and you really do mess with everything else.  I used to pick up a lot of extra night shifts.  In fact, there was a time that I would work as many night shifts as physically possible to make extra money. These were 12 hours shifts.  The most that I did in a row was nine.  Nine night shifts, each 12 hours long.  Now that was the maximum but not the usual.  The usual was worse in some respects.  It consisted of about 5 to 6 per week with a day off so I would not get in trouble by management and then another 5 to 6.  Now I look back at that and think what the hell was I thinking??  And was it worth it in the cost it did to my body?  Probably not.  Oh well it did pay the bills.  Nice to have that extra cash.

But you come to a point that the extra cash does not really mean that much when it comes to your health.  So now, I still work the night shift but I don’t pick up any extra.  The problem I run into a lot is: “If you don’t have the money then you can’t buy it.”  Lol.  That is something that I still have trouble remembering.  But I am getting better at doing it.

I keep coming back to the above quote about letting go.  And I have come to the realization that there is much, much more meaning to it than just the statement of letting go.  Think about how many times you feel that you have to do something.  And ask yourself do you really have to do it today or tonight or even at all?  There are so many things that we do in our lives because of misconceptions of what success means, misconceptions about how to reach a goal (sometimes less is more), misconceptions about what people will think, misconceptions about what is necessary today and what has become nothing more than routine ritual.  Now don’t get me wrong… There are some situations that the answer will always be YES you have to do that now.  But I bet if you are like me, there would be a lot of situations in which the answer is no.  You don’t have to do it.  You can let it go.  Let the stress go, let that need for control go, let go of your attachment to being right, let the fear of loss go, etc.…

Let go and:  “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” – Joseph Campbell

Now I would like to say that I have mastered the art of letting go but that would be way, way, way far from the truth.  But I am working at it.  And that in the end is all that we can do.

Looking west towards the foothills in Fort Collins on Thursday, the readings were in the moderate range and climbing.

Well that is about all for me this week.  The only “fly in the ointment” so to speak has been the smoke layer here on the Front Range.  The last two weeks the air quality has been in the moderate range with a few days being in the really unhealthy range.  This does put a damper on outdoor activity that involves running, biking, etc…  I guess it could always be worse, at least our homes are not threatened directly by wildfire.  So, have a good weekend and maybe if the smoke clears I will see you somewhere out there on the trails.